Houghton Mifflin Discussion Forums

Replies: 3

bluewave

Posts: 4
Registered: 6/15/10

my own beautifu boy
Posted: Jun 15, 2010 2:26 PM

My 18 year old son graduated on June 5 from high school. My 23 year old son was kicked out of the house on June 5 for drug use. This has been the most difficult couple of weeks in my life. I found out that my son had transferred money form his younger brother's savings account into his and then withdrew the money to buy oxycontin. My handsome, smart, funny son has been using this awful drug now for five years, the last two right under my nose in our home..I told him he could not come back to our house and that he had to seek help. His father and I are divorced and his dad took him in after he walked out of a detox after one night. As it stands now he is working and telling everyone that will listen that he will never use pills again and that he"means it this time." I started reading Beautiful Boy three days ago and just finished it. It sounds like our story and I am so grateful to have
found such an eloquent and moving testimonial from a parent who wants their child free from the grip of drugs. I feel like the breath has been sucked out of me and so many emotions are running through my head. I have neglected my other two sons terribly in the past two years trying to "cure" my boy and now realize that we have to go on living our lives. My ex-husband will come to realize that when our son says he has "left his money at work so that he won't spend it, and will just use if for lunch" really means that "I bought more drugs, even after all the turmoil of the past weeks. I want to feel like myself again but it's so difficult.

JLP2

Posts: 64
Registered: 2/22/10

Re: my own beautifu boy
Posted: Jun 15, 2010 8:07 PM

It is difficult, none of it makes sense does it? You really do have to get through it one day/hour/minute at a time. Come here where people do understand what you are feeling, we can at least listen with compassion, no judging. Take care and rest.

mixnroll

Posts: 59
Registered: 5/23/10

Re: my own beautifu boy
Posted: Jun 16, 2010 6:37 AM

Yes this is a place where people understand what you are goring through. It is so difficult. We dontnknow exactly how much or what drugs my son is doing. However we did kick him out of the house on Sunday. It breaks my heart but he seems to feel he can live and do whatever he wants with absolutely no regard for the rest of us...and I keep thinking if we continue to let him do this then the lesson he is learning is that he can do that in life and it will work for him. The reality is that it won't. But i sure am worried as he is only 18.

Fatima

Posts: 125
Registered: 12/30/09

Re: my own beautifu boy
Posted: Jun 16, 2010 9:17 PM

Hi mixnroll,
My youngest daughter age 19, left us at 18 after walking out of a residential boarding facility. It's been a little over a year and she's out there doing drugs. She won't tell us where she lives, so it's pretty heartbreaking. I have over 20 different phone numbers, the last one already disconnected. All I can do is just wait and pray for her next call. We thought that a year out on her own would be enough.. at times she's shared being tired of her lifestyle..but hasn't reached out for help yet. Going to AlAnon meetings, sharing in this forum and spending time in prayer is helping me, however, I do have terrible painful moments. We are powerless over their addiction and horrible choices. Their youth and immaturity is their worst enemy.