When I read the book I couldn't put it down, I have a 24 yr old that has been doing crack cocaine for 2 years that we know of, she won't go to rehab, we have tried, she refuses.She refuses to get help, she won't admit she has a problem, once she threatened to jump out of my moving car as I tried to take her to a hospital. My heart breaks every day for my beautiful girl. The words on the pages explained exactly how I feel and I thank you David so much for doing the hard work of writing this book. I pray for my beautiful girl every day and I pray for ALL addicts that they find their way out of that hell. Please God lead them away from that hell. I grew up with an alcoholic mother and I promised myself when I had my own family that drugs and alcohol would not be a part of it, I never thought I would be fighting this battle with my first born baby girl. Sometimes I wish I could go back to the years when she was young so that I could have one more day of her precious childhood, there are no do-overs in parenting though. This is why my heart just breaks.
Dear Brokenheart, Thanks for your post. I really hope that when you think of your mother's alcoholism and your child's addiction that you are not blaming yourself. When I attend Al-anon meetings, they're filled with normal parents-like me- who are dealing with addicted children (or addicted spouses, parents, siblings). I first heard about the 3 C's there: 1) You didn't cause it (the addiction) 2) You can't control it 3) You can't cure it
I wasted time blaming myself for my daughter's addiction and it got me nowhere. Except that my kid would try to manipulate me with that guilt so I had to work through it. I was and am a good mom as I'm sure you are, too! Research is showing that addiction is an inherited brain disorder. This doesn't give our loved one's a free pass, though. They need to work on their recovery because as far as brain diseases go, this one is cureable.
I pray that today, you & I (and others who may read this) find some peace.